Thursday, April 2, 2009

Baby Humor!

Reasons Why I Can't Wait to Have Kids


Baby Keeper : This is a dangerous idea. Not because it looks unstable or poorly constructed, but because its utility is too seductive.Once the parent realizes how freeing this is, it will never stop with bathroom breaks. Want to vacuum? Slap that squirming bundle of modern art up on a closet door for a few minutes! Not enough room for the groceries and the child safety seat in the car? Use those hooks on the bumper and make an impromptu side car!



O'Pair Baby Leash-This is a great way to teach your children "I trust you exactly none." Think of it as a renewed umbilical cord designed to transfer shame instead of nutrients.





Man Boobs- From the instant any man dons this apparatus he can count on deeper bonding with his child, getting paid 25% less to do the same job as other men, and being grossly objectified for his sweet, sweet ass. On the flipside, he'll probably never have to buy his own drinks again.




Baby Mop- Make baby earn his keep...Inventors in Japan are fed up with babies constantly making messes and never cleaning up after themselves. Introducing the baby mop, this leverages the all natural cleaning power of drool to buff your floors to a high shine. Please note that extended wear on carpet may build a static charge equivalent to licking a car battery.




Po-Knee- The cleverly named Po-Knee brings the technology of faux pony rides into the new millenium. Parents, always verify the individual offering a spirited Po-Knee ride is wearing pants. Never before has Creepy Uncle bait been so sophisticated.


HAPPY THURSDAY!!! One more day :-)

17 comments:

  1. Oh my GOSH I am just dying reading this!!! I think my MIL fancies that she still has one of those leashes for my husband...

    Thanks for sharing, this is tooooo funny!

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  2. These are really funny! Great way to start the day!

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  3. This is hilarious! Love your blog:)

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  4. Hey I'm kinda diggin' the baby keeper! Just for public bathroom purposes because if there is anything in your shopping cart, you can't take it into the bathroom! And the man boobs? No thank you. Does anyone know a man that would wear that?? I don't.

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  5. I had a 'leash' when I was little...hahaha! The man boobs are a little too much! hilarious

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  6. This is so freaking funny! I just sent this to my friend who is preggo. I cant believe they really have these things!! cute post!! xoxo

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  7. bahahaha! that's hilarious! The best one is the 'baby mop' one.

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  8. This post is awesome! Thanks for the giggles.

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  9. too funny! love the first one!

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  10. LOL!! this post absolutely MADE MY THURSDAY, SO hilarious!!!

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  11. haha, I love it!! The man-boobs made me think of Meet the Fockers =)

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  12. Great post! This is hilarious. Love it!

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  13. I have never heard of those man boobs. That's so weird.

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  14. That was freaking hilarious! I enjoyed every moment~!

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  15. Lol...this post cracked me up!!

    I hate seeing kids on leashes...it is one of my peeves.

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